Tag: calming

coffee and cornbread, a moment of calm…

Morning sunshine spills through the windows, and the air is filled with the smells of coffee brewing and cornbread cooking. On the radio tucked into a corner on the counter, the DJ gives the local temperature and then a favorite 80s tune comes on.

Standing in the kitchen on this chilly February morning, I have a rare moment of feeling peaceful, cozy, calm. A rare moment of feeling optimistic about the day ahead and life in general.

I listen to the music as I tend to the task in front of me. For the past few years, the way I make cornbread is by cooking it in a skillet on the stovetop, and I flip the rounds the way I do pancakes.

When they’re done, I choose one, top it with melted butter, and enjoy my piece of cornbread with a hot cup of coffee.

I don’t know what challenges the day will bring or what is ahead. I don’t know if my husband will feel good, if I’ll handle things well, if anxiety and fear will take over.

For now, though, I’m not focused on any of that. I’m able to be in the present moment, this moment of calm.

And I’m grateful.

❤

revisiting genealogy as calming distraction…

I’ve written before about genealogy (as well as looking through old newspapers) serving as calming distraction for me. I enjoy genealogical research and exploring old newspapers anyway, but the calming and distracting aspects for me add to their benefits.

As so often happens, I’ve had periods lately of intense anxiety. I spend time with my usual tools and helpers: painting, praying, porch time, reading, brain retraining, hanging out with my husband, watching “comfort” shows, talking with friends…and, yes, spending time with genealogy (and newspapers.com and findagrave.com and facebook groups focused on the history of my family’s area).

Trying to fit the puzzle pieces together that make up my family tree. Researching places and businesses where my relatives worked or spent time. Learning about what was going on when my great-grandparents (and beyond) were alive.

Doing this gives my brain something to focus on instead of fearful thoughts about the future.

Although any aspect of this can be helpful and enjoyable and lead to new discoveries or confirmations, there are certain things that have captured my attention in a deeper way. I turn to these again and again as I try to learn more about them.

My father’s paternal grandparents fall into this category. An old abandoned and mostly-vanished factory cemetery is another one. A long-standing building in my hometown is also on my list. Another is a church that, over the last 130-plus years, has changed names and merged and moved.

I dip in and out of researching these people and places. They are smaller “pet projects” under the larger umbrella of genealogy and local research, and they give me familiar things I can pull out and give attention to whenever I want.

They are calming distractions I keep in my toolbox of things that help when the anxiety is high…or things I can focus on simply because I want to spend time with them.

I don’t know if I’ll ever uncover more details or find more answers to the questions I have about these people and places, but I enjoy the exploration.

And that’s why I keep on researching.

♥

porch time…

Sitting and relaxing and unwinding. Breathing in the fresh air. Getting calm. These are some of the benefits to having a space outside to retreat to and sit for a while, especially on a regular basis. For me, it’s our little front porch.

I call my time out there my porch time. (Also known as porch sittin’.) And it’s something I’ve come to consider as being essential to my well-being the past several years.

Porch time is a time when I usually read whatever novel I’m reading. Sometimes I have my coffee out there. Sometimes my husband joins me in porch sittin’ and we enjoy the fresh air and nature sounds. Sometimes I take a TV tray out there, get settled with my tablet and foldable USB keyboard, and work on my writing.

Sometimes I don’t do anything but look at the sky and breathe, doing my best to release whatever stress and anxiety I’m feeling.

Our porch is very small and quite narrow. But it’s covered, so it protects from sun and rain. There’s room enough for a wooden park bench along one side and a folding camp chair on the other, and little outdoor pillows for each, so it offers spots to sit and relax. We have a couple of small stands and tables out there, so it gives room to place coffee cups and books.

And since it’s literally right outside my front door, I don’t have to get in the car and go somewhere to get to a relaxing spot…which means I can spend time there even if I’m having a low-energy or off-balance day.

In cooler months, I put on a sweater or jacket while I’m out there, and I have a lightweight flannel throw to keep me extra cozy while I read. When it’s hot, I can take one of our small battery-operated fans to help create a breeze. The weather (especially when it’s cold) does keep me away more often than I’d like. But then I get back into the routine of it as soon as I can because it is so important to my mental and emotional well-being.

Porch time is calming and relaxing, but it’s even more than that for me.

It’s grounding.

It’s restorative.

And it’s healing.

Do you have a space like that in your life? Somewhere you can easily get to, a place to unwind and breathe and get grounded and simply be?

I hope you do. It can really help.

❤