writing routines and rhythms…

I’ve never been good at sticking with a regular writing routine on a long-term basis. What seems to happen is that I develop a loose structure for myself, either for a period of time or for a particular project, and it works for a while.

Do I beat myself up about it and feel guilty about lacking discipline? There have definitely been times of that.

But I was recently reminded that it’s helpful for me to think about my writing routine less as a structure, and more in terms of a rhythm.

The rhythm isn’t always constant. It shifts and changes. But the beat of my writing is always there, even if it’s in the background of my life.

And when there are times I seem to lose the rhythm – which does happen – I just need to listen for it and connect to it again.

For me, that feels like a more gentle way to return to a writing routine, instead of trying to guilt and shame myself into a structure. It feels like a way of giving myself more grace. It feels more like being kind to myself – and to my writing.

And feeling that way helps me get back to writing, which connects me more to joy, and fuels my sense of purpose.

These past months, as I’ve been trying to find my way through grief and change, my writing has been quite start-and-stop. This has been a period, however, when I haven’t been beating myself up about it. I believe it’s been important to give myself the time and space I need for such major life events.

Time and space is still needed, but I’m starting to write more again. I’m also starting to feel the need and the desire for more of a regular writing routine again. More of a rhythm again.

So I’m leaning into that, and letting that desire guide the way. Not thinking of it as structure. Not thinking of it as a should.

But experimenting with times of day. Playing with flows of words. Listening for the beat of my writing and synching with its rhythm.

Connecting with the joy of it.

How about you? What helps with getting you to write? Whether it’s a structured schedule, a go-with-the-flow loose routine, or something else, the important thing is being aware of what helps you write if writing is what you want to do.

this summer…

It’s the last day of August. Labor Day weekend in the US is almost here. And, no matter what the temperature and the calendar say about it, I always think of this time as the end of summer…probably (in no small part) because from kindergarten through being a high school senior, the first day of school was the day after Labor Day.

Time isn’t so delineated for me now, at least not in the same way, but that feeling must have soaked well and deep into my bones because it’s lasted all these decades since then. Most years, Labor Day weekend feels like a marker, a before-and-after line for the year, a time to look back at the past few months and take stock of the season of summer. And although summer heat impacts me more than it used to, and most summers now don’t hold the same sort of magical feel of earlier ones in my life, summer is still a season I enjoy.

This summer held lots of time with our girl. Even with her continuing health challenges and the uncertainty of how much time she has left, she enjoyed happy and energetic days these past months, and we continue to treasure each good moment she has. We went through a decluttering and reorganizing spree in July, and she helped (in her own way)!

I continued to spend time on genealogy and historical research (exploring the histories of the places my ancestors are from). I read novels. I went for walks.

There has been ongoing work on my current novel, as well as new guided journals I put together and have available on Amazon.

And, as usual, daily paint play has helped to ground me, calm me, and connect me with joy.

Continuing the trend of the past several years, the summer also held lots of anxiety and stress and challenges.

But I continue to pray and take things day by day, step by step, moment by moment.

I continue to do the things that help me. I hope you find what helps you too.

 

 

and now it’s March…

Time still feels strange to me, passing fast and slow all at once. I’ll think about posting something here, and then…more time passes.

Anxiety is still a problem for me, in a big way. It’s been a bit over 18 months since my taper off xanax ended and I still have times of flare-ups of various symptoms, and my central nervous system is still super-sensitive. I continue to try to take things day by day, even moment by moment, and get through as best as I can. As to be expected (since this is the way life is) some days are better than others.

Here are some of what’s currently helping me through what continues to be a difficult time…

Painting.

Even though I can’t really explain the why behind it, holding a brush and moving paint (on a page or a canvas) helps me calm. I don’t worry about how it looks. I’m not doing anything fancy. I even call what I do “paint play” because I’m just playing, simply moving the paint wherever.

It’s okay if I don’t know the why of it working – what matters is that I know painting helps me, and I’ve been spending time doing it. It’s grounding, and relaxing, and calming. It’s one of my joy connections – and whenever we can connect with joy, it helps.

Writing and research.

I’m putting these two together because, for now, they’re overlapping for me a bit.

As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve been working again on genealogy research.

I’ve also been doing research for my current fiction project.

But. I’ve been having trouble getting back to a regular, consistent, routine with writing. To try to shift this for myself, I decided to try having a writing schedule even though, historically, writing schedules haven’t worked out too well for me. I’m willing to try it again, though, so…I’m giving it a go.

What I know is that my life is better, in general, when I’m writing consistently (especially, when I’m writing fiction). Even when life is difficult, it’s better when I’m writing.

That’s a big reason I’m giving the writing schedule a try again. I really-really-really want to get back to writing consistently again.

Walking.

Because of various physical things, I’m not always able to take nice long walks. But taking walks is something else that really helps me. It helps the anxiety, it lifts my mood, it just makes me feel better.

My husband and I have been walking in the neighborhood, as well as taking walks some days near his workplace on his lunch hour.

Getting out in the fresh air is something else that really helps me.

Reading. And watching shows.

Reading fiction takes me to another place, putting me in the lives of imaginary characters far away from whatever is happening in my own world.

Spending time reading on the front porch has become a grounding routine of the past months, and it helps calm me. I also generally read for a while in the evenings.

Watching shows does a similar thing for me, putting me into another place and time. I have a variety of what I call “comfort shows” and I’ll often watch complete series multiple times.

Prayer and Bible study.

Time with Jesus just helps me in so many ways. It brings comfort and clarity.

It helps me remember that I’m not alone.

It helps me deal with life.

Connection with loved ones.

Hanging out with my husband… taking walks with him, watching “our shows” together, sharing meals, cooking our usual breakfast-for-supper on Sunday evenings… I’m so grateful for him, and for our time together.

And there are the phone calls and texts and messages and voxes with friends and family.

And also…

Our girl.

And this sweet kitty continues to bring joy and love to our household. We love her to bits.

These are some of the things helping me through.

Simple things, but oh so helpful and valuable.

Find what helps you get through, what helps you cope and deal… and what helps you connect with joy.

I’d love to hear what helps you (if you’d like to share your thoughts) – just get in touch with me anytime.